Dear Jamie: The article where every social group, band and person gets the p**s taken out of them – in the nicest possible way of course!

You know, many people would think that writing articles daily would get tiresome. I’m safe to say the answer is yes, yes it does.

But it’s you little bundle of joys my readers that keep me motivated. While you’re all playing on your Xbox 300′s, and PS10′s I’m slaving away underground producing articles day in day out. However luckily I do get snippets of information from the outside world; the reason I was so accurate in naming today’s technology!

This week however you may notice I’m two days late on posting the Dear Jamie article – the reason for it is because I had to wash my masters socks – honestly he would have got Ron and Hermione on me apparently.. whoever they are.

Yet I was compelled by a persistent stalker to our site known only as Jay Sanderson to post this article today, late. Partially as a thank you for his consistent readership but mainly in fear of him tracking down where I live and stealing my precious ring. So lets swiftly move on to this weeks Dear Jamie!

Dear Jamie,

I was wondering, if charlie chaotic and amy anthropy are in the woods, while no one is around, do they still strike a scene pose?

Jay Sanderson.

My Response:

Hello mister! I swears I don’t have the wardrobe, or the lion, or the witch! However I can answer that question for you! It’s extremely likely that both Charlie Chaotic and Amy Anthropy would strike a pose in a wood BUT if Twisters around then that will distract them ‘fo’ sho” due to the array of colours. If one was considering to approach these ‘scenes’ in such a desolate environment then I would extremely recommend taking Eye Liner, a NeverShoutNever/BrokenCyde CD, a reflective yo-yo, and this weeks edition of OK! – I don’t have a clue why, they must like how the true life stories reflect their own life – also possibly the reason they love reflective yo-yo’s!

Dear Jamie,

What is your favourite band at the moment and what song by them do you recommend?

Charlotte.

My Response:

Hi Charlotte, my favourite band at the moment would definitely have to be Delain and their song Stay Forever so you without a doubt have to check that out if you like Within Temptation, Nightwish, Evanescence etc. However to give you more of a scope I’ve decided to suggest bands from across the board:

  • Steel Panther – Death to All But Metal. (N’aww don’t you just love how accepting metal heads are of other genres, it’s so sweet! Even more so that the song comes from a glam rock band.)
  • Metro Station – Shake it. (I know I’m going to have the devoted Emo’s like ‘OMG DAT SONG’S SHITE’. Well I say to you Mr. Emo just because you think a song is ‘shite’ doesn’t make it non-emo.)
  • The Macabees – Love You Better. (Okay the amount of Indie Music at the moment is getting ridiculous. It seems the more ‘jibberish language’ you speak in a song the better it does. I’m waiting for that cool bloke who does all the CD adverts to go: “This week the Macabees release their new song  ‘jsejajdqjadjq’ out Monday”)

I hope I’ve helped you Charlotte – and please note that Delain – Stay Forever was actually a serious suggestion.

Dear Jamie,

If you could change your name to anything in the world, what would it be?

Ashton Cooper-Swanne.

My Response:
Hi Ashton, I don’t think you properly grasped the rock themed blog properly, but nevertheless thanks for your question. If I could change my name to anything in the world then it would without a doubt have to be the ‘Tin Man’ then perhaps I would be allowed to join Metallica and then they’d rename it to ‘Tinallica’ then someone would write into Kerrang all like: “My mum was hoovering the other day and it suddenly hit her – no not the football that was later, yet this time it hit her – the tennis ball in the head made her think ‘Tinallica’ sounds like ‘Tinallycats’”. Then me and James would be all like ‘LOL’ and make ‘Tin Ally Cats the musical’. The environmentally friendly, 100% recycled, robot cat musical singing Metallica songs; how awesome would that be?

(Look at that for dragging out the answer to make a higher word count.)

That’s all this weeks questions and answers, don’t forget to comment below your questions for next week!

PS: See if you can also find all the movie & book references that I have woven into the article, some form of small prize may be given to the winner!

Article by: Jamie